Principal Investigator: Dr. A. Partition, Eorzean Environmental Psychology Unit
Publication: Strategic Eorzean Resource Review · Bacon Industries™ Internal Research Archive
Despite widespread dissatisfaction with object placement, collision detection, vertical positioning, furnishing limits, and general human mercy, adventurers continue to spend extraordinary amounts of time decorating private residences. This study asks why.
1. The Placement Problem
Participants were given a chair and instructed: “Put it where you want.”
Within 11 minutes, the average participant had rotated the chair 47 times, attempted several illegal placements, discovered a workaround, and placed the chair somewhere the laws of architecture did not appear to permit.
The participant then described the result as “actually pretty good.”
2. The Housing Rage Cycle™
| Phase | Typical statement |
|---|---|
| Inspiration | “I'm going to make such a cute house!” |
| Discovery | “Oh. Okay. I can't put that there.” |
| Engineering | “Wait. I can float it.” |
| Madness | “WHY DID THE TABLE MOVE?” |
| Enlightenment | “...I can make a loft.” |
3. The Sunk-Cost Effect
After approximately four hours, participants no longer described decorating as enjoyable. Instead, they described an intense obligation to finish a task they had personally created.
The harder an object is to place, the more emotionally valuable it becomes.
4. The Floating Furniture Effect
Furniture that could not logically exist in three-dimensional space was consistently rated more impressive than furniture placed normally.
| Object state | Mean rating |
|---|---|
| Chair on floor | 6.1 / 10 |
| Chair on table | 8.2 / 10 |
| Chair floating six yalms above floor | 9.4 / 10 |
5. Conclusion
Adventurers do not decorate houses because the system is easy. They decorate houses because the system is difficult and they have decided to defeat it.
“The home is not the product. The struggle was the product.”
— Bacon Industries Housing Research Division